“Mummy, seriously, I’m confused. I’m trying to endure.” Margret complained to her mum about the changes in the attitude of her newly married husband, when her mum visited. But her mum assured her that it’s part of the adjustment at the early stage of marriage.
Margret kept insisting that Thompson had ceased to be the man she married. She just hoped things wouldn’t continue that way. Her mum continued consoling her, reminding her what she told her when she was much younger, about he changes in her father after they newly married. “And you also will soon get used to these changes. You know we’re all humans and at one time or the other, we experience some changes, even with yourself. It’s one of the stages in marriage,” she concluded.
Thompson came home in the evening. He quietly looked around, looking for what to use as an excuse to have a quarrel with his wife. On sighting one of the baby’s shoes on the table, “Margret!!” he shouted. Margret was happily coming out to welcome her husband. “What’s the meaning of all these!?” he continued, pointing to the shoe on the table. He was seriously annoyed with his wife. But his wife was surprised at his high tone and what she saw as an unwarranted anger. “But darling, this shouldn’t be an issue. It’s just our baby’s shoe,” she responded.
Despite Margret’s effort to diffuse the anger, it got hotter. Thompson threatened and attempted to slap her, of which she dodged and escaped for the moment. It was not for long.
Margret’s father, Mr. Williams called Thompson on the phone and booked an appointment with him and his wife over the weekend in his house. “Though we will have a tight schedule by weekend, we will try and make it sir,” Thompson responded. But he was very furious that his wife must have told her father that he beat her.
That evening, as Thompson got home, all hail broke lose. Despite the wife’s denial, Thompson insisted his suspicion was right. Margret later admitted. “You’ve been punching me like a sand bag at any slightest provocation, even when I’m breastfeeding the baby, and you think I didn’t come from a home? Did you think I wouldn’t complain to my parents before you kill me?” she snapped back at Thompson. “Do you know how many similar hurdles I’ve crossed successfully? This will be like one of them,” Thompson replied. It did not end well that day either.
The day with Mr. Williams finally came. Mr. Williams was in a very bad mood, scolding Thompson. “Actually, sir, it’s not the way she said it. You know women, they easily exaggerate things,” Thompson defended. Mr. Williams was not taking it. “What exactly is that thing reasonable enough to raise your hand on a woman? And we’re talking about your wife here,” Mr. Williams angrily fired back. Thompson had never seen his father in-law in such mood before.
Margret was weeping profusely in her mum’s arms. She had been through a lot in the house of Thompson, her husband. “Mummy, did you know he beats me even when I’m breastfeeding my baby. He doesn’t even care that the baby could get hurt,” cried Margret. “What kind of nonsense is this!? I knew there were changes in your father then, but I never experienced it in this form,” her mother said. She assured her daughter that her father would talk some sense into her husband. But Margret insisted she’s worried something might happen to her if nothing urgently was done. She even refused to go with the husband. But her parents persuaded her.
The issue was settled and Thompson apologized to her wife and promised never to lay his hands on her again. That was a promised which was never kept.
Margret’s mother kept talking to her husband to find a way to bring back their daughter before it turned to a sad story. But Mr. Williams would always remind her of their tradition which does not allow their married daughters to return back to their parents except some certain tradition is followed.
Mr. Williams was in a business meeting when his phone rang that her daughter was rushed to the hospital in an ambulance. She was pronounced her dead on arrival. Mr. Williams arrived at the hospital, devastated. He was just looking at the lifeless body of the daughter and her body covered in bruises.
Thompson was falling around and rolling on the floor. The did has been done. He had beaten her wife to death. He could see all his life before him. He was seeing the noose around his neck. He wished it could be in a dream. He wished someone could just perform some magic and return his wife back to life. He could remember his neighbour’s advice which he scuffed away. He should have listened to his neighbour and sent his wife back to her parents if he decided their differences were irreconcilable. That’s all in regrets now.
Mr. Williams could hear all the pleas of his wife to bring back their daughter while there was time replaying in his ears. He didn’t know how to break the sad news to her wife. But she’s heard. And she was on her way to the hospital. Mr. Williams could not put himself together when he heard his wife had heard, and on her way to the hospital.
If Margret could see tomorrow, she should have left the abusive marriage alive and damned the consequences and the stigma.
If Thompson could see tomorrow, he should have taken his wife back to her parents if he realized their differences were irreconcilable.
If Mr. Williams could see tomorrow, he should have listened to his wife and would have brought back his daughter alive and damned tradition.
Whether a Christian believer or not, avoid abusive relationship. So many of us make mistakes at one time or other in our Christian journey. But that’s not the end of life. Jesus is always with us, even in our mistakes. He always ask for us to transfer the burden on Him. He’ll help us bear the burden. It could come in form of an abusive relationship. But when adequate necessary steps have been taken and it continues, listen, He might be telling you something else in form of bearing the burden for you. Be sensitive.
Though the Church take “For better, for worse” vow exchange as a sign of unbroken covenant, it is not written anywhere in the Bible. That is why it is explained in one of my articles on dating that you must be attentive and careful enough to understudy who you’re dating. If you’re not satisfied with what you observe, kindly call it a quit immediately. In that article, it is also advised you date someone of same faith with you because it solves about half the problem.
Do not pay the ultimate price when Christ has done that for you. Take a walk when you can.